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Thread: A Disciple's Thread

  1. #286
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Can't even be myself, Can't even write

    Yeah i can write in a freestyle like flow and just spit it out fast sometimes too. The weird thing is I have a hard time reading mine outloud to people. I'm definitely NOT a performer or ever wanted to be - but i love to write. I think it was Mathew Kelly that wrote or Strength Finders? I read both books but anyway one of them said to fuck what you are not good at and focus on what you are good at. I loved to write since I was a kid and now that I am too sick to go back to work in corporate I hope I can make a lifestyle and living of it. My sister says when she retires she will help me write a book. And I did write one but they wanted me to pay to publish it... like nah if it was good enough they would pay me. I'm not doing that.
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  2. #287
    Princess Jonny Knows Candy's Avatar
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    Re: I Will Go Down w/ This Ship

    Quote Originally Posted by A Disciple View Post
    My favorite style to write is trap and underground... I can do poetic too but I don't think it hits as hard. I like to answer back to the songs that meant the most to me and got me thru it. It was a therapy taught to me when I was 14, that transferred with me into my alternative school, and a peace and understanding that I can't let go of. I always said if I sold a piece - I would give the original artist I was answering back to 10% and thank them for helping me to think things thru too. I'm so grateful for this site and hopeful leagues will be back soon - I want to get better and perfect the skill and one day help someone like these artists helped me.
    very cool.. well atleast you got the new ppv - you should post your new avy pic in the photo promo so they can get our match rollen

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  3. #288
    Princess Jonny Knows Candy's Avatar
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    Re: Thank you!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by A Disciple View Post
    That’s mad sweet guys... I finally got an accomplishment!! And thank you for being so kind regarding my outbursts and shit. No matter how many times I swear I’m a stop - I be like wait I have something else to say! I’m glad the site is coming back. And yeah I’m def a big and pac mixed up in a pot a second too. I’m grateful to be but I do have my own skills... I don’t trace... I actually hate them when they try. We all wanna be the best one day!!!

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    I wanna keep work, work and family, family... definitely for now. I don’t even know what’s going on and nah I don’t won’t everyone in our business like that until I do too! Ok?
    ill only post in here with you if you want some one to post to.. we can mix it up together - and congrats on your achievement

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    il start with my fav pac song..

    what is yours..

    do you like the biggie and pac collab?





    and who do you like better?

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    Quote Originally Posted by A Disciple View Post
    Eminem songs that come to the top of my head... you’re never over, mocking bird, toy soldiers, so bad, rap god my jaw just dropped... no love, Stan... and like Em? Genius - I wish someone would do a tribute. And even though I’m white - it was 50 lyrics to get me thru most too! The both of them... when I was a 5 year after “patiently waiting” ... and still wrote anyway. I love to write and I want to be one of the best some day too!
    respect yall heard this cat


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  4. #289
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Disciple's Therapy Session

    I will try to keep my outbursts here. ANd the 3rd I think I get it but I wasn't called bronze that night at Streets, I was the Green Hornet. And I believe I keep going insane because the wrong bitch keeps demanding to wake me up after everyone saw what happened with that in 2010. ANd like HE IS my best friend... not her. My brother is on it too - so hopefully this all gets resolved soon and I will and can be normal again.
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  5. #290
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    Did you guys delete that to help me or help them? Umm I've only had 4 boyfriends and lived with 4.5 men. Cedric, L, Ben which was the .5 and not my boyfriend, Ricardo, and Ray... oh and Anthony pretended to be my boyfriend too. I haven't had one for 8 years cause i waited a year for my BD to come back and he didn't. So now I can barely even have sex to be honest and the last thing I want is a man. I do have peace and comfort somewhere I know that. But maybe after the smoke clears if I can even trust peace and comfort again since it seems to be thrown all around. Nah I never messed with Ikon in any way shape or form and I want to know why he was lying to me about not knowing you or the situation too.

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    It's been a living hell beyond comprehension... I don't want to talk about it or relive it either. I just want to cut ties to all them bitches and move the fuck on. Nah I really don't understand how she even got that rite to begin with but I believe because she lied to my brother and said she was my best friend. WHY? I have no clue. I STILL have no clue... but I don't even care either. Just want to heal and get better and move the fuck on. I'm still not really feeling all like myself still but I have faith and patience still.

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    To literally try to demand to change my religion though and abuse me in ways that you would swear it could only be god himself to do that to you... like God gave them your body? And tries to force you to go to enemies to help... like you bitches done did some real shit. I'm just sorry it had to be my family to suffer for that instead of yours where it belongs. Hopefully shit gets resolved real soon because you all put me thru enough already and God knows I didn't deserve it.

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    They took the fact that our families were fighting and played on it. My brother knows not to block you now.

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    I don't know how you handle betrayal but me personally hopes my god gets them back for me cause I don't want to waste another minute on them instead of my family. My god said if it happens again I can kill them. I hope thats a CAN and not a HAVE to.

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    OMG I love St Augustine... i have to finish watching.

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    Yeah i was kinda tripping in the jail on the tour, I don't know why I hate them so much

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    I don't want to disrespect Hollins, but I believe his church was moved to our town at the time recently too.

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    I used to feel safe around ghosts when I would hear them walk... even that night at red club one tapped my arm and I sat down quick. But like when I came home from Norwalk everything changed and I even was choked by one. I still go to the cemetary to talk and get my peace. And there is still ghosts around that I trust. It's the witches I seem to have the most problems with and I assume my ghosts and their ghosts just don't get along.

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    I saw a droid in St. Augustine and posted it... I'm sure its probably been deleted since (since somone on all my accounts) but I just laughed and laughed. And it was also when I freaked out and tried getting help again.

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    No one would believe me.
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  6. #291
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    it took 10 split seconds back to remind me of everything... down to I already had an OBGYN to call the first time I THOUGHT i had sex and got crabs. I don't know if it is just my daughter or if I had twins. THATS what is important to me and keeping them safe. I don't want to exploit them either. I don't want everyone in my families business especially before I even am. I write, I'll talk about big and pac etc but not my babies until I know what's up with them and how they feel. And I am really upset that I couldn't even get weekends but like.... I'm trying to maintain and understand why and know that you know how you would feel.
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  7. #292
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    I'm not upset about that... I know I am not built for that life. I do want you to be happy. But I still reserve the rite to lay on my babies dad anytime I don't feel good and need help. And for some more dumb bitches to go there too...
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  8. #293
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    I just want to get better... get them sssholes that put themselves into our story out please. Just a lesson of betrayal that I need to learn how to be smarter about when they pretend to be loving friends. That's not like me or my karma and it's all good. I just want my families back and I hope that is still possible.

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    I'm grateful for your mom to have raised you. I'm not sure who but please be sure I would never disrespect her either. Unless she did some striaght up shit to me to and then I would talk to you first. I know you're grown now and that breaks my heart too... but we are all still here. I hope we can still try to be a live like a family again and I hope you have lots of pictures of you growing up too.
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  9. #294
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    And them bitches just laughing about the shit still and trying to make it look so minor and petty and stupid. Nah they did some real shit and they know it.
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  10. #295
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Halloween Thread

    I'm going to try to sleep and pray by morning that everyone who isn't my family is spiritually gone. I don't want to hear or feel like them bitches anymore or ever again. I trust L though. He can be on my roof too. But that's it... my BD and who he says cause I know how busy he be and my brother, Please try to understand where my mom was coming from. I get it... I'm sure she will learn to truat you again too.
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  11. #296
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: I had ribs removed so I can suck my own dick AMA

    @Candy send me the link
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  12. #297
    Princess Jonny Knows Candy's Avatar
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    Re: A Disciple's Thread

    heres for the photo for the promo ppv - put your avy one in there or if you got another one do that..

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...le-of-the-Tape

    this is the thread to the whole thing..

    theres a topics thread for our battle n you gotta send it to soule' once you read the rules and write your verse

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/foru...st-of-the-Best

    -----------------------

    oh in my accomplishments where it says i am your boyfriend i dont know how it got there - so either you was thinking it or i was thinking it lol but seriously i think soule did it

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  13. #298
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    Re: A Disciple's Thread

    Dawg what in the fuck

  14. #299
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: A Disciple's Thread

    @Candy I can't find the topics but I will write Soule... and seriously thanks for baring with me. Mental Illness just totally SUCKS.
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  15. #300
    Soule
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