"I'm so fucking Emo"

[Vincent Maestro]

I'm just emo man....I ain't mad at Y'all
but at least I can respect Hitler for having Balls
soldiers in Iraq are dying its you they defend
but you sit there dying for feeds to ya new OM
I'm not anti-semitic or some kinda neo-Nazi's
Sometimes i wish someone genocided complacent Emcees
so when I wake up it wouldn't be your face that I see
this hate that I breed is American and raw
I'm being real don't care if it failed to leave you in Awe....
I have the sincerity of a diary book entry
and enough vocabulary to be the illest writer of my Century
I grab my revolver wishing it could hold ten
I respect mariah noelle more than some of you Grown Men
y'all reads so boring make me wanna sniff coke till my nose bend
this might get you upset and kinda rock ya world
one of the illest emcees here is a 14 yr old white girl
I could give a fuck if they rape me or Adore me
sometimes I pray I get banned cause y'all so Corny
they say flatterers is like wolves so I'd rather you hate
I'd quit but then I would be quickly Replaced
with another overpassionate motherfucker without a face
He'll say the same things I did and his rhyme will get Erased
Could give a damn if you think I'm all in bad taste
I never wanted to drop a scrumptious read
I'll leave you with shrunken gums and ugly teeth.
Bitch, I'm EMO.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ny-357634.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ro-357722.html

[Broly]

Nice piece, i can see that you were writing from the heart
and really- thats all that matters, emotion was strong and
used in the right way, structure was cool- but i dont see any
real reason to give you critique here, cause you already stated
that you didnt care, and since you wrote this from the heart
it cant really be critiqued, but keep writing and youll soon elevate
to be one of the nicest writers on this site.

[Cosa Nostra]

ok if this can be separated into two parts, i'll say the stronger part is the last half. since i am ur friend if i start kissin up on ya ppl would be i am dick riding so here i go wit some harsh comments...

I'm just emo man....I ain't mad at Y'all
but at least I can respect Hitler for having Balls
soldiers in Iraq are dying its you they defend
but you sit there dying for feeds to ya new OM

thass like totally random....wat does the second bar have to do with the first one?


I'm not anti-semitic or some kinda neo-Nazi's

love the anti-thesis and word play here

Sometimes i wish someone genocided complacent Emcees
so when I wake up it wouldn't be your face that I see

if i see one more bar where emcee is rhymed with 'see'...

this hate that I breed is American and raw
I'm being real don't care if it failed to leave you in Awe....

2nd part gets better

I respect mariah noelle more than some of you Grown Men

like this line

sometimes I pray I get banned cause y'all so Corny
they say flatterers is like wolves so I'd rather you hate
I'd quit but then I would be quickly Replaced
with another overpassionate motherfucker without a face

very strong and love the imagery


I never wanted to drop a scrumptious read

i gotta look up 'scurmptious'

I'll leave you with shrunken gums and ugly teeth.
Bitch, I'm EMO.

good

overall tight drop....but you need it make it sth. that can be read over and over and over again and everytime one reads it fresh they discover sth. new. cuz that's what art is all about. keep droppin' and fuck the haters!

[the_origin]

i felt this yo but i agree the second half was a lil tighter. it seems like the more u wrote the more u got into it but overall i thought this was tight.

[Morbid Dream]

, the read was interesting and the title was funny. a real eye grabber only i didnt see the relation between title and verse
Not many multis but the rhymes were good. Apparently i mistook some of the content. I'm a bit fatigued now but i'l fix it. Your verse had a lot of feeling put into it. I'm assuming you had some kind of incident with other members. material deleted?. Points for emotion.


Best bit

they say flatterers is like wolves so I'd rather you hate
I'd quit but then I would be quickly Replaced
with another overpassionate motherfucker without a face
He'll say the same things I did and his rhyme will get Erased
Could give a damn if you think I'm all in bad taste

actually pretty good.

[Broly]

He was referring to mariah^.

lmao

[LedgenZ]

^rotfl...he was talking about another member that just so happens to be a 14 year old girl.

[Morbid Dream]

^^^Ha? What? What are you talking about ? ROFL

[Broly]

I respect mariah noelle more than some of you Grown Men
y'all reads so boring make me wanna sniff coke till my nose bend
this might get you upset and kinda rock ya world
one of the illest emcees here is a 14 yr old white girl

Ledg, lol what are you talking about?

[Mariah]

thanks for the shout out...wtf @ all the hate...I pwn you all cept Ledge...he my buddy.

[Man of Steel Man]

this piece was cool fam...i like the emotion here it actually inspired me to hit off a bit of a rant in my piece taps...so away from my segway to my stuff...you spoke alot of truth in your drop and you did it with a good flow and emotion as i said before...its funny how when you speak that speak...people come in your ish and start conversations about other things...ignoring the whole point of what you were doing...so i give you props and kudos...be sure to hit up my taps joint when you get a chance...its my last piece for a while, unless something forces me to change my mind...bit of a kiss my ass type piece...and you might need a dictionary for this one...wink wink hint hint

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ps-357925.html

^^enjoy

[Dayvid Aimz]

Yeah not bad. didnt know you were a girl though. Wouldve thought you were a heiroine. aside from it, the read was interesting and the title was funny. a real eye grabber only i didnt see the relation between title and verse
Not many multis but the rhymes were good. Apparently i mistook some of the content. I'm a bit fatigued now but i'l fix it. Your verse had a lot of feeling put into it. I'm assuming you had some kind of incident other member. material deleted?. Points for emotion.


Best bit


actually pretty good.

Yeah...I'ma guy.....I was talking bout mariah....

[Broly]

thanks for the shout out...wtf @ all the hate...I pwn you all cept Ledge...he my buddy.

Dont kid yaself lil buddy lol

[Dayvid Aimz]

Dont kid yaself lil buddy lol

both of y'all is my homies......
but I'd love to see this one go down.

[Jon]

thanks for the shout out...wtf @ all the hate...I pwn you all cept Ledge...he my buddy.

until i step in..

wtf happened to my shout out!? *killsself*

oh well, nice piece, a little weird and not really a concept to it.. but overall it was decent.. you are working on the basics, and keep getting the basics to look nice and you can move on to bigger stuff.. and it'll turn into the snowball effect. keep writing dude, you have potential. keep reading pieces, and keep writing.. hopefully you'll be in SS someday