User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: To look at one's self...

  1. #1
    Ipsum Provoked Images's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Age
    37
    Posts
    1,168
    Battle Record
    8-8

    To look at one's self...

    i can not beat myself

    i reach but no higher will my fingers touch tha stars

    for i have reached and felt

    tha tear of a God drip from tha heavens

    i have watched and pondered

    but no answer will penetrate my senses

    i move through, instead, into my soul

    but it is too dark to see

    thus...i walk blinfolded and hit my heart

    but it beats no more

    as i walk tha path imbedded in my mind

    tha shadows move and dart

    and they tear open my thoughts to reveal myself to myself

    i do not understand

    will you help me?

    i don't believe you will as i watch through my deep portals

    known as only "eyes"

    but my eyes are shut

    thus i turn around to walk straight back through tha veins

    until i reach my limit

    then i melt into myself and am once again...

    REBORN...

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

    - I'd Be Brilliant, If Only, It Was Not For Love's Immortal Stand Offs -
    ...Understandable...

  2. #2
    Ipsum Provoked Images's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Age
    37
    Posts
    1,168
    Battle Record
    8-8
    uppin!

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

    - I'd Be Brilliant, If Only, It Was Not For Love's Immortal Stand Offs -
    ...Understandable...

  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Smooth JT's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    boonies
    Age
    38
    Posts
    246
    Battle Record
    0-1
    your poetry is from the heart and I respect you for that. It's even easy for me to understand and to see from your point of view.
    "Leave your feedback on the page because only the peanut gallery is welcome here"

    "You laugh at me bacause i'm different but I laugh at you because your all the same"

  4. #4
    Ipsum Provoked Images's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Age
    37
    Posts
    1,168
    Battle Record
    8-8
    uppin!! from some real peeps...

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

    - I'd Be Brilliant, If Only, It Was Not For Love's Immortal Stand Offs -
    ...Understandable...

  5. #5
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Guam
    Age
    35
    Posts
    22,986
    Battle Record
    62-46
    Awards SS HW Champion Haiku Champion FL Champion PS Champion/IE Champion WOP Champion OM HOF PC HOF 50+ Wins
    iight

    i liked this here, it seems like something new, different then what ive seen you write before, but its nice.

    the flow was good, it kinda seems like one of those soul reading ones ( not quiet sure what its called )

    your vocab fit the piece, didnt try to put in big words that didnt fit, they all went nicely

    the first line got me hooked it was a great opening line, and your ending was my favorite part, its not one that leaves you hanging like the door closed in front of your face, locked out from where you feel it should have gone

    my love

    ~Tera~
    DONT HATE
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

  6. #6
    Ipsum Provoked Images's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Age
    37
    Posts
    1,168
    Battle Record
    8-8
    uppin!!

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

    - I'd Be Brilliant, If Only, It Was Not For Love's Immortal Stand Offs -
    ...Understandable...

  7. #7
    Killa Feaster
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Posts
    392
    Battle Record
    6-4
    uh huh...ma man..this was nice...purely felt fa sho....ya flow was there...not a rhyme but a flow in words if you get my meaning...i liked the internal view of self...as ofcourse...self portreyed poems are among ma favorites...and this b one now....

    word ma nig...you held it down....



    i have watched and pondered

    but no answer will penetrate my senses

    i move through, instead, into my soul

    ^^as of course no words come from gods but from within...thats nice that you incorperated that into this...


    igido
    Wit.

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •