A Disciple's Thread

[A Disciple]

Not all but funny too

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I think it’s angels to remind him and us and other people that angels be every where for reason

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For every single one… good and bad

[A Disciple]

Well… angel X

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What he say… to leave to you Lord… not them… cause here on this earth out of people…. No one knows what it’s like to be yourself or know yourself more than you. I do know what I’m not and it’s not right that they keep trying to force me

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I didn’t say for reason I said FOR EVERYONE

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Who keeps trying to set me up on some dumb probably can’t admit that they’re were and are wrong - on the dumb juvenile shit

[Candy]

[Candy]

[A Disciple]

Kim’s Crew

Nobody in my hood come in hot blasting music
We weren’t together then and you let him lose it
Stupid ass bitch he didn’t chose it
I told him to invite you over while I went out
It was his bday, and at that point was just threw with shit no doubt
BUT… you abused it
And truth be like…
We got back together sooo
It was his idea to get the apartment
How was you at the police station fronting like YOU was it though?
Like I was the mistress nah I was legit
(Then I thought a bit like he wasn’t coming home hardly…. like maybe… if so - tag you it)
I called and left a message he was homeless and that was it
I ain’t with this shit not even a little bit
Lives been lost and cause no one told me we couldn’t do shit
No disrespect but how I get thru it?
Being blamed for everything like you personally was to do it?
Standing over your bed?
Bitch how you know though?
Nah I wasn’t but how you know when I didn’t even know though
And that’s when my one to start to grow, so…
It’s literally 20 years later
Just a decoy they set up on purpose
To play with us all like we they toy and just crack their curses
Some are left just snatching up purses
Me? I just vent via these verses
And Von I’m sorry but that’s your boy
And I want no parts, ties, or nothing!
Cause everytime they do it on purpose
But I’m happy now and usually know what my worth is
Do you know how disrespectful to me rebirth is?
Or like when I go to pray and who, who ever cut me off and go first is?
It’s a joke… I can’t sing and never thought much about what hating on another bitch bring
It was never my scene
And well now I know…
Time to go…
I respect not worship the God below
And as far as psych go? THATS where the feds need to intervene

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Though*

[A Disciple]

Deciding if I want to bake… or just go to bed…

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Von… I heard you tonight and can’t find to listen again but technically cause of your side we can’t even be friends… I like G and R too but K started too mucin shit believing his own lies and I want nothing to do with it or you all now - sorry but we still cool

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You better not have been out here talking about him though… I wouldn’t hit you but that’s my baby!

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The 20 deodorants and shit part…

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Does Alfredo go with spaghetti squash?

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I’m a try to sleep though…

[Candy]

spag and alfrado dope alfrado better by itself though but you cant beat the classics

[A Disciple]

Wanna be Free



I was 13 the first time I went to mental
You made me cry missing the incidentals
24 when I first was diagnosed with schizophrenia
So don’t act like I wasn’t prepared to face the friend in ya
Fake, phony, superficial, and lying
It hurt so bad sometimes I would be driving in my car and just bust out crying
Everyone tell me don’t look back
But it’s an animal instinct that they must lack
All I know is I’m the only one that ever had my back besides my family
I learned it’s best to keep it real and all they do is act
Trying to get the best of me?
No one knowing the rest of me
What… I don’t have a right to justice
Tell me where you think the trust is
God… not you, get over yourself
And my cards too, just praying for some mental health
1991-92… I lost all my memories from October to August too
What about you?
A fucked up dr that I’m trying to sue
He treated the Newtown sociopath too
They should’ve just stopped when they saw the 30 point drop to my iq
Brainwashed me right, I remember the hypno that i try but can’t seem to undo
And I remember wondering why they kept testing me too
I’m not some trick you just play ball with
The game, the game… oh my god I hear so fucking much about playing games
Wasn’t me homie… and I don’t forgive you or them the same
What’s my angels mother fucking name?
I heard plenty say yellow
Bitch in me? Hell no
But he had me at hello
I guess I was just hoping
But I know what hope does…
Makes it harder and longer until you let go of what it was
Just having trouble coping
He so mad like I won’t stick up for myself
But he don’t know what it’s like when no one pick up the phone every time you need some help - and he did
Maybe he was paid to answer and pretend too
How would you feel if it wasn’t me and it was you
That’s weak to them I guess, weak to the older me I must confess
Weak to someone who wasn’t made to feel less
He left me again but it should’ve been me to leave
I wanted love… I just wanted to believe
I don’t feel stupid I don’t give a fuck anymore
3x to be honest I wasn’t scared of hell and wanted to die more
What the fuck am I here for?
Nah god - nobody understand me no more
I want to be free
I’d give anything to just be me
Finding out who I am now by knowing what I’m not
But it hurts and it’s painful but I’m tired of crying a lot
Maybe now that I feel I can heal
Then I look at my high school best friend
Everything to live for and cancer trying to bring that to an end
I do pray we trade places and bank on some green and white faces
So we can remember the fun before life tries to replace us
I want to exhale I want to be free
It’s so fucked up that I’m Catholic but even Allah found and protected me
I’m not sure if things were meant to be
But really Lord… I just want to be free
Thats why I’m so reckless cause it unfolded for everyone but me
And they still won’t let me see or get some type of clarity
X you said the Lord knows you best
I believe that but I know me too
I know I need comfort and to be honest they stole my dreams of family too
Something that’s too late and they can’t undo

[A Disciple]

What would you do if it was you?

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My mom said 2024 is going to be the year I get my strength back… shit popped off at 5:15pm and I held it together until 7pm but yeah I had to leave school again

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If I make it… I’m a put angels that glow on the highway to remember them too

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I’ll never defend a kid killer but it always made me want to throw up wondering if he was even there

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Feds if you doing anything… regulate and get on psych for real

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Cause I didn’t deserve this either

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All I wanted was babies since 5th grade… they took my life too

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They refuse to talk to each other and purge our files every 7 years like an expense report… it’s too late for me to get better but maybe if you make them follow the laws the next one can

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I lost my job… got confused on a call

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Yo the bitch Valente was a therapist not even a dr and I had them on dna but she called the er CALLED the er and they just put me in psych

Now I know why I was hyperventilating to the cop when I told him since I was a kid… and nah it wasn’t him - but it was someone

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Thank you and hysterical - tongues don’t have to be so horrible but nah I can’t shut up

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Involved in a killing? NO but his eyes flashed gold the day before and I heard him when he got hit like he was right behind me but he was far behind… I never missed a save again though. Just took years to come to terms with in the picture I drew that I had horns too

[A Disciple]

Fuck what you heard I have one 425k hits… something got to work out for me in life

[A Disciple]

Nah… just like A… a couple days apart and I’m over it - must’ve been another spell

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I still don’t know why that bitch hop up on all my shit though

[A Disciple]

I want to throw up right now… I don’t think I’ve ever been so dead

[A Disciple]

Yay!!! He came back… have so much to blog re mental be back later cause they off the hook

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Ok… so I was in for Neuro psych testing. They never sent my text reminder and at 9:04am they called to see if I was making my appt when I was already checked in and in the lobby type weird. They had to observers which is the funny part… any way they do that usual sleep shit that make me confused as all hell that’s my only sign I get when they do… but they saw I was getting confused to the point of literal retardation didn’t care just kept on going until my bf text and came to make sure if I was ok… I left and rescheduled the rest of the appt. If they were going to continue that for 4 hours… I might’ve been brain dead - and I am SO serious. So with all the fucked up things about mental I really hope they were feds to witness but I doubt it. They off the hook… I feel better today but yesterday was so bad and is why I hate going to mental too!

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Brainwashed already caused atrophy in my memory part of the brain and they still just don’t care. My father knew my phone was going to be back when I was being tortured in “solitary” in NC… and it clicked his sister is a psych so I finally found out how I had a baby and didn’t know, got assaulted and didn’t know it, and got shot and didn’t know it too… I want to sue for my civil rites back but my bf said don’t bank on that or get upset if a lawyer doesn’t help me. But due to the assault and other evidence I reported rape 3-4 times…. Once with a cut they pointed out to me on a VV… and they NEVER called the police or investigated, they just threw me in mental… I had them on DNA twice and the only way they would know how to do that to me is mental… they dead wrong and need to be federally regulated and made to keep all files like real drs. Regardless if I was right or not THEY STILL HAVE TO INVESTIGATE LIKE I WAS EVERY OTHER PERSON… I had them on dna twice and they didn’t even fucking care!

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If you want to ask a question… ask me awake and to my face for real… how did that happen to even begin with. And now I know why my father took it to his grave. He was protecting his sister!

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It wasn’t my step dad either but I bet they planted that bug too

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I know it wasn’t him because they hit me in CT NY NJ and NC

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So if the feds still on the site…. IT PSYCH THATS OFF THE HOOK

[A Disciple]

Yo it’s that serious… and if they do kill me… make sure they NEVER get my body for science too!

[A Disciple]

Their motive… now leave us alone pls

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wtf they even care for anyway?!?)?

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Guys they truly are out for some of your blood too! I just want to clap back on psych and oppression and shit.

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I know it’s a federal case… I was fine at $54k a year… I hope they at least have malpractice but now I want a lot more. Negligent homocide for my dads yeah no common sense sometimes. Its why he drank himself for sure I feel

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Drank himself to death*

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And then they try to blame Tupac?

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The paper on my dads hospital wall

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I refuse to go to court or any near them… put it in writing if they want to face the accusser

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Yeah and I’m pretty sure that one really was there the night I went to court but don’t remember only getting woke up in the cop car

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After

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It’s a good thing sane people saw it then!!!!

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I’m really not doing well today and need a nap!

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Victimss have rites… I’ll block my account cause now - I want to recover

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I never in my life wanted fame*

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When I know I’ve been heard and they get investigated and regulated

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Or the tv in jail maybe if I have to be there…. Not going to jail but vidcon type if I’m safe cause I opened my own doors for them somehow

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Jails and psychs? To make people better not worse… t

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Psych off the hook JB st Mary’s too