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Thread: Going to the casino to think...

  1. #1
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Going to the casino to think...

    I know why Pac ran... well not know why but know that he ran

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    You run and you done
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    K. .

  3. #3
    The Original Legend Quotient's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    I like to think that somewhere in the afterlife Pac is reading this thread and is just as confused as we are.
    WordPerfect

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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    Quote Originally Posted by Quotient View Post
    I like to think that somewhere in the afterlife Pac is reading this thread and is just as confused as we are.
    How so, sportsfan?

  5. #5
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    So they carded me but didn't card anyone else and I couldn't even get on the table. I didn't have my license on me.

    I saw Pac like 3x I think... I saw him when they hurt me in MB and assumed it was hallucination but when I saw the video to his better off alone remix I was like yup it was definitely. Honestly, sometimes I get confused if he even like me or not. I'm glad I finally woke up - but not like this. I'm glad I ran thru all the bullshit and finally see - I just never expected to be left on my ass with no protection.

    You know we have to delete all these threads... right?
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    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    The second time I saw pac... was after the bonus 187 incident and the 222 nextel and I was starting to realize I "live in a different time zone" and that like witch craft or what ever could be real and I was with my ex in the hotel and thought I seen pac through his eyes - got scared and ran out the room literally. Like an hour later my ex got busted. If I wasn't scared and ran I could've got in trouble too for just being there - so he saved me a charge.

    The first time I saw him was on E 125th. My boy left me in the car in the winter for hours. He couldn't leave the spot it was hot but I didn't know what happened. So I asked this office to use the phone and they called the cops on me. I told them me and my boyfriend got in a fight and I don't know where he went. So they took me to the train station and helped me to buy a ticket home. I was waiting and under the bridge this chick asked me for a cigarette and when I gave it to her he looked thru and nodded like pay attention. I didn't realize it was the same eyes until the room that night.

    I guess final evaluation is like "unborn child" like people not awake yet. I think that's what he meant when he always talking about his kids he either did or didn't have. That was when I remembered and listened to "Still Down" The best I can say is the dream when I got shot 5x thru my exes car door or the anaphylactic I had and tried to leave the hospital cause they were taking too long. I could've helped him thru some shit he didn't realize and maybe he could've helped me thru this.

    Life isn't a game to me... you only get ONE shot. There is nothing amusing about that.

    Now BIG? I swear I STILL think we arguing. Ghosts are real, there is life after death - that should make us all feel better.

    But nah, I gave up 10 years ago that Pac was still alive somewhere (they really got him). But on this ghost shit. They BOTH still here.

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    Why am I mad at Big? Because the first time I ever got sick "mental" I woke up and text my ex "instincts of a spider done crept up inside her" and it's pretty much been straight hell ever since. ESPECIALLY the past 6 years. No one has my back.
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  7. #7
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    Pac and 50s.... what’s that mean?
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    Quote Originally Posted by A Disciple View Post
    Pac and 50s.... what’s that mean?
    I remember very very vividly that Tupac had a tattoo on his stomach that said 50 niggas and he was proud of it because he had finally got through number 48 and 49 and sucked the dick of number 50.

    You couldn't stop pac from sucking dick. He actually went to prison for rape. You literally could not stop him

  9. #9
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    One time I got sick and was falling asleep answering weird questions and heard that’s her... I called out numbers all night. That tattoo made me think 50 got that trigger to get ALL these mother fuckers off me but idk either. I thinks that’s why I was scrambling for him when I got back on the site. But idfk either - tired of the physical pain and gross shit.

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    And there’s a god right here co signing it all... I don’t get it either but I know I deserve peace and comfort in my own body especially when i didn’t even do a thing wrong. I guess they not getting the right answer from me and now I know. I don’t regret that... I’m glad I know now and pac was the only one waking me up screaming it to me. At least trying to... and now rust I’m up - these assholes breaking all the rules... my life, my decision but I can’t even pray without hearing pls forgive me. Forgive me for what? Feeling like my enemies etc... somebody mad but I already been thru too much - 6 years ago prior scrambling to this now - yo somebody has to do something cause I don’t deserve it. Idk why they raped me.

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    But I have a feeling it’s a twisted spell to do this

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    They’re on my body hurting me in ways that only god should be able to do.trying to force me to turn to enemies for help the physical pain too!!!! Taking 6-8 ibuprofen a night for almost a year. I been thru enough even prior. I remember when they started hurting me, I saw Mary and told her not yet - not like this... I’m starting to regret that now but not really cause mine made it. If I let go they stop... I won’t cause how the fuck they even get that say and for so long. I wish I died when if they shot me cause ever since? Nah I don’t deserve it and it makes me mad to think me and my life was sacraficed to people like them

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    Why I have to fight this hard

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    I can’t believe they even try to pray for me

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    I’m in so much fucking pain right now because I won’t turn to them... I can’t stand them bitches

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    They’re hurting me because I won’t turn to them bitches for help

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    I can’t believe they’re trying to demand my life be about them

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    And there’s a god who lets them

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    My god BETTER torture them too

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    Low life loser bitches too
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  10. #10
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    No matter how mad I get at pac, I can't hate him and it feels like I'm in a rock and a hard place... first you want me awake then you don't it's reach for mines, it's let go, like WTF... Ain't nothing sweet about Hail Mary - do you really wanna know my part in that song? I'm just confused. I'm to the point that I don't understand what anyone is saying or ESPECIALLY why my family would be mad at me. You may be dead but you're not helpless - so when are you going to help me? That's what it feels like...
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  11. #11
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    I worked hard on myself… why would I give up that to be judged for a bitch like you?

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    “Peep the whole scene going around me” I only bucked one second cause M was trying to take Js boyfriend and then wanted to come with us to the store. After that I was fine… a fight broke out outside and I didn’t even go out cause I wanted to play cards.

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    Not that J the other J…

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    The Acs were white and for Chris… of course

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    I doubt Chris would want me to go to or have anything to do with them bitches religiously and if he did I would still decline… like nah

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    It even sound like Fs flow… he saved my life and pulled me down. But nah I don’t want her man either.

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    That’s crazy that everybody know my business except me

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    They played opera on my voicemail at IBM that confused me… believe me the man is sick beyond comprehension.

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    Wanna beat a bitch and then kiss her type

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    Wanna keep a bitch sick type

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    Until I’m free and get comfort and peace in my own body and environment… I’m not getting locked in hell for them or with them. Dream on!!!!

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    I rather be dead than to live being forced to share my body with their religion and spirits

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    I’m not gonna be retarded for them either. Everytime you break you do more and more brain damage. Like you demanding a bitch to be retarded… why sir? Why do you want me to be retarded for you?

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    How you fight a twisted psych? Or several…

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    I’m sorry but have I even met you before?

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    You don’t tell me who I do or don’t be with…

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    Self defense isn’t murder… you don’t own me and you can’t force my life is yours either. Especially when you’re abusive, sick, and twisted.

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    Like pac… idk how to shoot and I’m worried about my families

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    It’s not my god and they can’t demand to be either

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    I’m going to McDonald’s… like I can’t believe this is my life for how I lived for real
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  12. #12
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    What would you do if someone was intentionally trying to make you retarded pac?

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    No disrespect I understand why someone would TRIST… just right now in my life it’s just not me and I really can’t… it the principle

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    It’s not always the lyrics I like in songs… it’s the delivery I like but noT any traitor shit like maybe you can trace and catch a lot of worms

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    Sorry but that’s not happening right now… my weight and body issues too like

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    Who swear they own me and my body for real?

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    Shit I’m glad we cremated my dad

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    I have no problems addressing their family… AFTER I speak to mine

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    Alone

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    I’m not related to them…

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    Them bitches crazy for this one!!!! A nut a nut a nut… like bitches step out my way

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    I’m gonna try to sleep… I couldn’t even get dressed today

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    Nah I’m talking to my old friends not my sister

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    Bath just appeared on my phone… like nah I didn’t get dressed today and being told what to do isn’t sexy to me either so

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    I want to be my best me not the worst and most sick I can be

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    Or a stalker… so like I swear it’s not my karma so how?

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    Some nosy confused bitches with evil minds that had no business lurking and creeping to even begin with

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    You’re confused cause our breed not the same… in fact your type is everything I was raised to be against to be honest…

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    I’m not gonna sit here tied down your bitch

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    Tied down and your bitch*

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    I’m gonna try to sleep… it’s annoying me more than you all for real

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    Yo they really think they are that important don’t they?
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  13. #13
    You've earned a custom title! Cody Nash's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    Rough night?

  14. #14
    MAD! A Disciple's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    My life, body AND after sacrificed to people like them? Yo I don’t think so

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    @Cody _nash yeah my ear popping and stuff
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    You've earned a custom title! Cody Nash's Avatar
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    Re: Going to the casino to think...

    Who is sacrificing?

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