I miss you

[Kuhn]

I miss you
Not the memory of you or even our issues
I miss the day to day promises and the balled up tissues
Sitting beside the trashcan our son forgot to take out.
The content feeling that nothing was right but it didn't matter.
The security of knowing I had somebody to keep in contact with
Because that meant somebody cared
Somebody cared enough to text my phone
Or look in my direction to make sure I'm breathing.
The underwhelming happiness I never noticed was there
Until the overwhelming feeling of sadness and despair
Because I HATE starting over, alone, and scared.
Not afraid of the self sacrifice I would surely have to go through
Or the sleepless nights in bed yearning for a hand resting on my head
Swishing my hair back and forth till I fell asleep
And waking up wondering if it were all a dream.
I'm not concerned about financial stability when I know i should be,
My only concern is the burning feeling telling me
That maybe it's for the best.
Maybe it's all a test, and I'm failing miserably
Because I refuse to take a test that I never studied for.
Maybe I've already passed the test
Because I can acknowledge the areas I neglected with you.
Maybe it's not a test at all
And you're meant to be just a reminder
That sometimes people care for short periods of time
And we should enjoy those moments
while we have the opportunity to do so.
No matter what the outcome between us is
I know there is one thing that I will remember.
I miss you.
Not the memory of you or even our issues,
But the feeling that somebody cared about me
When I have yet to figure out how to care about myself.

[ExPoeta]

See the fundamental idea of 'show-dont-tell' is missing here. Your emotive language helps to bring the piece into a light in which is relatable to the human senses, however what typically brings a creative work to life is the physical, concrete description of emotions, actions and environment. So for instance, sadness and despair are the kind of words generally best avoided due to not really giving a concrete image, but rather a ambiguous outline of an image. Also when rhyming, try to steer away from cliche or overly predictable word choice. Keep working on it man, you have a lot of potential and clearly a flare for writing.