1-2 Punch Mag-Week 4
First of all, personally I’d like to say wtf at all of the no shows that happened this week. I mean it isn’t that much effort to post up 2 lines and actually make them land. I hope next week will be much better when it comes to showing.
Winners of Week 4
Sea.Nile<-----Winner by No Show
End Plague<-----Winner by No Show
NawkOut<-----Winner by No Show
kid sick.<-----Winner by No Show
Urban Myth<-----Winner by No Show
Synonym<-----Winner by 3-0
…Paramik…<-----Winner by No Show
Jay Walker<-----Winner by No Show
Wyte<-----Winner by 11-0
Teacher<-----Winner by 7-1
Cry<-----Winner by 13-3
Chris Farley<-----Winner by 12-0
Flexplicit<-----Winner by 5-0
Wireless<-----Winner by 14-2
~SMOKEY~<-----Winner by 9-0
Spekz.<-----Winner by 7-0
LI<-----Winner by 6-5
Educated<-----Winner by No Show
Caeser Augustus<-----Winner by 7-0
Rory O’ Shay<-----Winner by 2-0
Verbalism<-----Winner by 2-0
TayTay<-----Winner by 12-2-0
SoliDuZ<-----Winner by 6-3
C.Wrighter<-----Winner by No Show
Camarac<-----Winner by Chrit’s Retirement
^Congratulations to all.
No Show Hoes
Street Disciple
Nymph
~One~
Supernat
Schizmatic<-----Technical
Tae
Bem
OrFentik
Journal!st
Onus.
SmokaJoka<-----Technical
Black Lizzard
~Luciano~
Skillbert
Talent<-----Technical
COM<-----Technical
Advisory
Detroitspitta655
Best Battle of Week 4
Rory O’ Shay vs. Degage
Imo, it was Rory vs. Degage. Both came with very good punches. Rory just edged it because his punch was a bit better. Props to both for coming good this week. Degage’s punch came from the movie Kazaam. Starring Shaquille O’Neal. In the movie, Shaq was a genie who granted this one boy’s 3 wishes.
kazaam, like magic an even matchup & its clear to see
^that i dont need to make a wish to make O', Neal to me
Kazaam was the genies’ name. You should really be able to understand it quite clearly from there. O’ is in Rory’s name and Neal is actually Kneel.
Rory’s Punch had to do with a shotgun never being found in the back seat.
Degage aint gettin pussy, and as sorry as that seem..
Aint never been a shotgunner..found in da back-seat
He was saying that Degage isn’t a shotgunner cuz he’s in the backseat. I guess. I can’t really explain it too much but it’s not Rocket Science to understand it. If you don’t pm him and ask.
These two punches were the best of the week imo. That’s why Rory and Degage had the best battle of Week 4. Congratulations you two.
Worst Battle of Week 4
Fatal BlacOut vs. Verbalism
First off I would like to say for you two, don’t be offended just step it up. Both of their punches were seriously whack. Fatal BlacOut’s punch had to do with wordplay from Verb being below him and blowing him.
Kid ur a fuckin gay no way you got a homie
Only thing that is right................................
....................is when u always below me (Blow Me)
No real hitter. I mean it could have been worded much better. It could have been set up much better also. Below me had absolutely no relevance in the punch. It was just out of place.
Verbalism’s punch was just calling Fatal a rash because of his crew.
from I.E., ur senseless havin to mimic another to win a battle
this bitch is gettin scratched off, cuz he is A-Rash-N-All (irrational)
At least his had some relevancy which made him win the battle against Fatal but still the punch was whack. Could have been much more harsh. Rashes don’t get scratched off anyway. You put cream on them and they go away. Lol. So this punch was seriously just whack.
I find it hilarious that both of them explained their so called “wordplay” in parentheses after they finished the so called “punch”. Lol. This is why this battle was the worst of Week 4. Except for all of the No Shows.
Match Breakdowns
Street Disciple vs. Nymph
Double No Show
End Plague. vs. ~El Gallo Negro~
End Plague wins via No Show. End Plague had saying Gallo would go 2-2 and the win is only behind his eyelids.(He dreams it)
Supernat vs. Skizmatic
Supernat No Showed. Skizmatic technically No Showed due to the fact he did not drop a punch.
kid sick. vs. Bem
kid sick. wins via No Show. kid sick. dropped a punch about him either dropping shit all the time. Or he’s just that whack.
OrFentik vs. Journal!st
Double No Show
Urban Myth. vs. Onus.
Urban Myth wins via No Show. Urban used a punch about the car Escort, saying it’s the only time Onus gets an escort to a dance.
SmokaJoka vs. Black Lizzard
Double No Show. SmokaJoka didn’t drop a punch which makes it a technical No Show.
Jay Walker vs. Skillbert
Jay Walker wins via No Show. Jay Walkers punch was about making soup in a pan. Skillets aren’t good for making soup. So it’s like he’s trying to make soup in a skillet. It’s not good. Skillet is used from Skillbert’s name.
Cry vs. Vlad Tempus
Cry wins. Pretty good battle. Vlad used a punch about kneeing Cry in the face till his face looks like dough. Cry’s punch was about the Devil winning in his life. He can’t find the Method(the name of Vlad’s crew) to kill himself, cuz Vlad couldn’t do it.
Chris Farley vs. …
Chris Farley Wins. His punch was about … getting overshadowed so much he’s starting to look albino. Albino’s are like black and white people(I think). You should get it. … used a punch saying Chris couldn’t have a weigh(way) with punches if dictionary’s were on scales.
Flexplicit vs. menolin
Flexplicit wins. menolin had a punch about wack finding Flex’s progress. I dunno. Meh. Flex’s punch was about menolin getting a first class stamp to his face. Sort of a cliché punch.
Wireless vs. Twixn..
Wireless wins. Pretty good battle. Twixn’s punch was about taking a bite out of Wireless like betraying his name. Twix is a candy bar. So yeah, should get it. Wireless’s punch was about how when stakes are high, kinda crazy that Twixn’s never in the mix. In the mix is Twix’s slogan. Basically, when it comes to something big Twix is never there.
~SMOKEY~ vs. Gurbil
~SMOKEY~ wins. I don’t know wtf Gurbil meant by his punch. Forgive me for that but it was gay. Smokey’s punch was about the only time Gurbil is noticed by people is when he gets jumped for warning signs. Should get it.
Soulstice vs. Spekz.
Spekz. wins. Soulstice’s punch had something to do with Spekulating a win. I’m not really sure. Spekz punch was about Camarac half assing in his LLL battle against Soul. Soul posted Cam’s verse and brought light to the battle. ‘Cept Cam’s verse was still hotter than Soul’s. Should get it.
Talent vs. COM
Double Technical No Show.
Jonathon vs. L.I
L.I wins. Pretty good battle. Jonathon’s punch was about LI being in IJL. He said he beat the L and I backwards and knocked out the J. Basically IJL to LI. LI’s punch was about when Jonathon is on the spot he drops shit. Should get it.
Advisory vs. Educated
Educated wins via No Show. Educated said Advisory isn’t a peeled(appealed) to battle. Orange’s are peeled so he called him an orange. Then said he’ll beat the pulp out of him until he loses his concentration. Pulp is in orange juice. Concentration is how much orange juice is fully orange juice without many preservatives.
Caeser Augustus vs. Odyssues
Caeser Augustus wins. Oddyssues had a punch about Caesar having his face in his chest like a picture on a necklace. I don’t need to explain it. Meh. Caeser punch had to do with it was like Odd didn’t even show up cuz he didn’t even post a respectable punch(I think).
DetroitSpitta655 vs. C.Wrighter
C.Wrighter wins via No Show. C.Wrighter’s punch was about DS655 using numbers in his name. That’s gay. So his text and his name is one in the same. Both gay.
Verbalism vs. Fatal BlacOut
Verbalism wins. Already explained.
Meters vs. Artistik.
Artistik. wins. Meters punch was about philly(Artistik’s alias) being an imitation and him beating the real one. Artisitk’s punch was about Meters being in the crew Hence Forward for 3 years and still going backwards.
Gho$t Wrighter vs. Legion. vs. flash
Legion wins. Pretty good battle. Gho$t’s punch was about how he wanted a challenge ‘cept FL doesn’t provide that. He’s saying that Legion and flash don’t post a challenge outside of Front Lines. Flash is banned but who gives a fuck anyways. His punches were gay. First about Legion fucking a dog. And second about Ghost being the opposite of him. Meh. Legion’s punch was about him getting into the league cuz he was good and them getting in just to fill up the 60 people needed. Saying if there weren’t 60 people needed they wouldn’t be in it.
Dunkalicious vs. SoliDuZ
SoliDuZ wins. His punch was about Dunk being a Mark and him sending him to vist the symbol on denmark’s flag( http://www.minitech.com/images/Speci...RK%5B1%5D.gif). Dunk’s punch was about him not being metallica(a rock band) but still rocking Solid’s face in. Should get it.
Synonym vs. $inister
Synonym wins. Syn’s punch was about $in and his mother sleeping in the same bed with the same guy. $inister’s punch was about shit happening whenever Syn raps.
Degage vs. Rory O’ Shay
Rory wins. Already explained.
Baron Mynd vs. Chrit
Baron Mynd wins due to Chrit’s retirement. BM was about Chrit being fat and stupid enough to think candoleeze rice was from a Cantonese menu.
MerkTimer vs. Wyte
Wyte wins. Wtf at Merk’s punch. Forgive me for not even explaining it. Wyte’s punch was about Merk facing the facts but he can’t look at his punch without laughing about how whack it is.
NawkOut vs. Tae
NawkOut wins by No Show. His punch was about Tae dropping Profit off his name(his name used to be Tae Profit) but now he’s just worthless.
…Paramik… vs. ~Luciano~
Paramik wins via No Show. Luciano gets a technical No Show imo due to time limit. I’ll explain it anyway though. Paramik’s punch was about unloading more bullets then paper clips in an office. Meh. Luciano’s punch was about Paramik having a buzz for a minute, till he found it under his boot. Like he was a bee or something and Luciano stepped on him.
Rico vs. ~One~
Sea.Nile wins. He had a punch about One’s life hanging by a rope. One’s punch was about looking at the river was the only time you could Sea(See) the Nile. Delivered horribly imo.
Miscellaneous Things
Battle with Most Views-Gho$t Wrighter vs. flash vs. TayTay with 192 Views
Battle with Most Replies-Gho$t Wrighter vs. flash vs. TayTay with 26 Replies
Battle with Most Votes-Cry vs. Vlad Tempus and Wireless vs. Twixn… both with 16 Votes
Battle with Least Views-Street Disciple vs. Nymph with 7 Views
Battle with Least Replies-Street Disciple vs. Nymph with 0 Replies
Battle with Least Votes-All of the No Shows
^Congratulations to those who brought attention. Lmao @ those that had the least of it.
Interview:
Lord of Pens=Anthony Gibbs
Wireless=Billy Bob
Billy Bob: sup
Billy Bob: i forgot i made this naem to fuck with somebody before
Billy Bob: this is wireless
Anthony Gibbs: Nothin much. Let's get to it
Billy Bob: sounds cool.
Anthony Gibbs: How do you feel about being undefeated so far?
Billy Bob: It's been a bit controversial.
Anthony Gibbs: In what way do you mean that?
Billy Bob: Key no showed, Educated edited his punch..so some feel I shouldn't be.
Anthony Gibbs: But imo, your punches have stayed consistently on point. Concepts were good. So I feel as though you would've won against opponents even if certain altercations didn't occur. Do you find me correct with this theory?
Billy Bob: Possibly. You know how things are..Sometimes people drop dope, and sometimes the just fuck up. But I can honestly say I'm getting sick of the Wireless name play. It's so unoriginal.
Anthony Gibbs: I can understand that. Being as though the Lord of Pens thing.....yeah. But how do you feel about your win against Twixn.. this week?
Billy Bob: Well, when I first saw him I figured it'd be hard. I've got respect for him in the 1-2 area, but moreso in the topical area. I think he seriously slacked in his punch against me. I'm guessing he just wasn't trying...It was just too easy of a win.
Anthony Gibbs: Respected answer. I have to ask the question. What will be your motive if you go up against your Mondu Thug friend Rory O' Shay? He's also been coming quite good in the 1-2 Punch. How do you feel about that matchup if it ever happens?
Billy Bob: It will be a battle of ages. It's too big to be contained by computers. There will be magical genies for paparazzi hopping out of airplanes for this stuff.
Billy Bob: And it'll be quiet good. Rory's a mondo thug legend.
Anthony Gibbs: Truth spoken. So what do you believe your chances are of at least making it into the Playoffs this season?
Billy Bob: Group A is a VERY comptetive group. I see myself getting harder heads in the upcoming weeks, so makeing the playoffs would be an accomplishment for me. But yeah, I think I'll make them.
Anthony Gibbs: Personally for me...the league was set up good and every grade has some very ill heads. But I agree with you. I've answered this question on my opinion in the Mag but as a participating 1-2 Punch Contendor...how do you feel about all of the No Shows?
Billy Bob: I hate em'. It is ONE punch. There's people like COM, Jay, Meters, and many more that are in LLL and put out no telling how many lines a week..Yet they still find a way to come up with another punch to buttfuck somebody.
Anthony Gibbs: Lmao @ buttfuck but seriously true. Some write up to 30 lines a week and still put out a dope punch. Me personally, have seen many played punches. And some potential biters. What's your view on this. I think some people are pushed because the itch of a win.
Billy Bob: Biting's just stupid. I've seen it before in 1-2, and am SURE it will occur again. Same goes with recycling..
Billy Bob: And my opinion is..Once a biter, always a biter..most of the biters you see now had bit before.
Anthony Gibbs: True...true. Last question of today's interview....What do you think hit's the hardest? Just your opinion. Nameplay, Wordplay, Meta's, Multi's, Cliche's, Personals, or a combination of any?
Billy Bob: Depends on preferences..I dont think wordplay works that well, but some people love it. Meta's are a bit appealing to me..Cliche's are something I use a lot..Multi's dont mean anything to me..I would say a combination for Cliche's and Wordplay, but that's just me.
Anthony Gibbs: Thanx alot for your participation. You may be called on later in the season for another interview. Good luck in Week 5 and the rest of the season.
Billy Bob: Same to you.
Billy Bob: MT 4 Lyfe.
Conclusion
This week actually kind of made me mad for the fact of all of the No Shows. But the people that showed up made it worth while to be here. I appreciate that greatly. To all those in the league, what I ask from you for Week 5 is to step it up. Bring you’re A game. It’s two lines. I’m assuming that it’s not truly that difficult to come up with something that lands and lands hard. Come with some fresh concepts. Also, vote it up next week. Every 1-2 punch battle should have at least 5 votes. It’s not that hard to explain. Your only voting on 2 lines. If it’s two great punches and you can’t decide, that’s good because people are doing there job. If they are both whack punches and you can’t decide. Call them both herbs and tell them to step it up. Good luck to everybody in the League for Week 5.
Written by Lord of Pens.
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