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Thread: Filthy Masterpiece

  1. #1
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    Unhappy Filthy Masterpiece

    Filthy Masterpiece

    Perfect in the eyes of the beholder, but flawed throughout the years...
    Lost in the laughter of his grinning precerverence, but still shedding tears... And his ice hard blue eyes cut right thru my bare naked skin...
    As he softly kisses my neck and my guard wears down too thin... With his virile features and skin the color of fresh powdered snow...
    Mirrored by perfection with his seducing baritone...
    He's the vital divine in such demonic form...
    And every compliment in repayed by the frutation of the whore...
    And he's arrogant in his mind, but treats us like a queen...
    And his hard liquored kisses are perfectly candy sweet...
    Abusing his privilages and taking advantage of the passion...
    With three little words and grammar adapted to enhancing...
    He's all I've ever wanted, yet something I'd leave behind...
    He's just so volatile and I cannot let him see me cry...
    I feel filthy lying in his T-shirt wrapped in bedroom sheets...
    And although I know I shouldn't take it, he grabs control of me...
    As he condemns my mind and corrupts my every waking act...
    I just take my pain and drag it along my scorching back...
    I find myself degraded, now on my dirty hands and knees...
    As I suck the innocence and leave you empty (be my disease)...
    I throw myself away forced into his filthy erotic slavery...
    Not willing to refuse the solicitation so I just compel myself to bleed...
    But I'd do anything for him, so I let it slide past my rotten shame...
    And although I pleasurize, inside my empty soul, I dig my grave...
    And as he fucks me up and leaves me tired, worn and thin...
    I disguise my crying eyes with a fragilant and blissful bearing grin...
    For I just take my limp and fragile temple and lie myself to sleep...
    I am forgotten and lying all alone drowning in this filthy masterpiece

  2. #2
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    Tell me what you think...

  3. #3
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    well... this place seems rather dead

  4. #4
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    I like it but at times it got a bit too freaky for me eg. 'filthy erotic slavery ' but overall it's good.

  5. #5
    Masterful imagery, painted a feeling of helplessness and pain. I loved it stay writin'

  6. #6
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    holly god damn!! i love this piece...not even joking ither this is one of the bes things ive read in a while i dont no if it stems from personal experience and if so thats realy sad but if not that was a very interesting story with conflicting emotions of love and self hate and she hates him but she lives him enouph to fake her happiness with him..wow..
    keep writing....

    can u retern the favor please

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....php?p=2978869

  7. #7
    Sencerity's Own
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    Amazing writing
    alittle Morbid but the intenseness is what captured me from the get
    some say theres two things that anyone can write about ( Love&Pain )
    but it takes more than just the obvious to express their meaning
    this post allows me and other readers to realize the exterior pain
    aswell get a sense of the emotional and mental anquish
    you nailed it
    very good piece
    keep it up

    uppp'n

  8. #8
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    Thank you all SO very much... u have no idea what this means to me... i will keep writing and im working on another poem, so keep in touch and look forward to it! thank you all again...
    POET



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    I'm in the mouth of madness
    With a tongue of poetry
    I ate the spine of Atlas
    Now the world is crushing me

  9. #9
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    and, yes, it is based on experience... but this isnt the worst thing thats ever happened to me... i just live for poetry... it keeps me sane.

    read my sn backwards, and ull understand what i mean...
    POET



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    I'm in the mouth of madness
    With a tongue of poetry
    I ate the spine of Atlas
    Now the world is crushing me

  10. #10
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    Good poem. I liked it.

  11. #11
    Newbie Sevas Tra's Avatar
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    I'm gonna bump this again....
    POET



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    I'm in the mouth of madness
    With a tongue of poetry
    I ate the spine of Atlas
    Now the world is crushing me

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