Tips for a beginner

For some odd reason, 2 weeks ago I got a wild hair up my ass and decided I wanted to start writing lyrics for hip hop beats. So far I have 3 songs that I have written but haven't really recorded the songs in their entirety. So, I have about a minute and a half of lyrics I would like to share and see what you think. Sorry if some is louder then other parts. The final will hopefully be better. I'm kind of a perfectionist so I wouldn't state anything sounding like this to be finalized. :P

I understand the quality is a mess, I'm recording at home with a $40 mic and Audacity, but i'm just doing what I can with the means I have to work with. I'm also recording in a super acoustic room with a 7 month old child sleeping in the same room so I had to lower my voice.

I plan on expanding my lyrical content to other things, this is just a start. Let me know. :)

BTW, the song's about female "rappers" or hip hop video girls who have little to no talent and get what they want by using men and somehow simultaneously think they're talented. It's mostly talking shit though. ;)

I tried to upload it to soundclick but there was some kind of database error so I made a quick YouTube.
[YOUTUBE]IgMx7LkXYso[/YOUTUBE]